Overcoming Post-Pandemic Anxiety
As vaccination numbers increase and COVID-19 cases decrease, there’s no doubt that the pandemic is winding down. In every sense, it’s great news: there’s less of a chance of you or your loved ones getting sick, our kids are able to look forward to going back to...
What Do You Call Someone Who Has No Feelings?
Decreased Affect and Anhedonia This question was posed to me on an online platform. To begin, if this lack of emotion is observed behavior, it is possible the person is simply not very emotionally expressive. We call emotional expression affect . Therefore, someone...
Coping With 2020
Accepting Things We Cannot Control What a year. As of this writing, 2020 is three-fourths over, there is no end in sight for the COVID-19 pandemic and the most hotly contested presidential election in recent memory is less than three weeks away. Stress, depression,...
Tell Me a Story
Enhancing Your Partnership with Active Constructive Responding There is a joke among mental health professionals that marriage counseling is about teaching couples how to fight. While there is some truth to that old joke, marriage counseling is really about teaching...
The Passive-Aggressive Partner
How to Recognize Passive-Aggressive Behavior in Your Spouse or Partner What does it mean to be passive-aggressive? The roots of passive-aggressiveness are in low self-esteem. Passive-aggressive people have a fear of, and therefore an aversion to, direct confrontation....
Why Do I Act That Way?
When was the last time you snapped at a partner, friend, or family member and then asked yourself, “Why did I react that way?” “Why did that make me angry?” “Why do I feel so ignored or invalidated?” Chances are these seemingly automatic, shoot-from-the-hip responses...
Question: I’m A Divorce Lawyer. Why Should I Send My Client to Counseling?
Referring Your Family Law Clients to Counseling This is a question I get from lawyers, as well as from other people. The common thought seems to be that the divorce is already in progress, so why bother? Because mental health problems in one or both spouses are a...
How Can Therapy Give Me Closure?
Closure is an artificial construct in our society. There is an innate human need to put our past experiences in a neat little box up on a shelf and say, "Well, that's over," but that is not always the case. Sometimes our experiences have long tendrils that will not...
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do
"Oh, to be young, and to feel love's keen sting." --Albus Dumbledore Question: My boyfriend and I are both in our early 20s. We broke up 3 weeks ago after a six month relationship. This was my first serious, adult (post-college) relationship. I know it's over but why...
Couples Retreat or Couples Counseling?
Are Intensive Couples Retreats More Effective Than Weekly One Hour Sessions? Generally speaking, I would recommend the multi-day retreat for couples who don’t necessarily have a specific problem, but are interested in growing closer and learning more about each other....
Is It Ethical for a Therapist to Advise a Client to Leave Their Marriage?
Should a Therapist Advise Divorce? As a general rule, it is considered unethical for mental health professionals to give advice at all. Our job is to help you learn to make those decisions yourself, not to tell you how to make them. Speaking for myself, I never...
What Should a Therapist NOT Say to a Client?
What Should Therapists Keep to Themselves? There is very little I will not say to a client; it's part of my job to be open and honest with them. It's more about how I say it. Emotional upheaval and poor coping skills are a recipe for irrational thinking and behavior....
Do People With Severe Mental Disorders Know They Have Them?
Do I Need Help? For starters, no one enters therapy unless they think they have a problem, so the short answer is, “Yes." However, very few people come into my office saying, "I think I have schizophrenia/narcissism/borderline/etc." The vast majority of new clients...
How to Fight Fair Part 2 of 2
Fair Fighting Rules for Couples Part 2 of 2 This is a list of ground rules for having a fair fight with your spouse or partner. In any fight there may be hurt feelings, but this list will help you avoid hurting each other unnecessarily. Remember, you are with this...
What Happens if I Tell My Therapist I Did Something Illegal?
How Confidential is Confidentiality? Confidentiality is sacred in Florida. Anything and everything you say in therapy is protected by law, and a court order is required to allow the therapist to break that confidentiality. Even then, judges are very reluctant to issue...
How to Fight Fair Part 1 of 2
Fair Fighting Rules for Couples Part 1 of 2 No two people agree on everything all the time. It’s simply not possible. Whether you call it a disagreement, an argument, or a fight, every couple does it. It’s normal. It’s healthy. If you and your spouse never disagree,...
Six Differences in Couples’ Communication Style
Six Differences in Couples’ Communication Style Many articles have been written about the ways men and women communicate differently. From a neurological (i.e. biological) perspective, the male and female brains process intellectual thought and emotions, and therefore...
Do I Need Therapy?
Do I Need Therapy? Have you been thinking about counseling, but you don’t know if it’s right for you? It’s normal to start thinking about how counseling interventions can help improve your life, but like any significant life choice, it could take some time to decide...